My hair has always been my pride and joy.
Through thick and…(well) thick, it has always been one of the few features of myself that I truly loved. One of the first things others would notice about me or compliment me for. It was chemically relaxed, long, and “pretty for a black girl” type hair and to be honest, that last phrase didn’t bother me one bit. I felt beautiful, and racial slurs weren’t gonna ruin it for me. I grew it and I got attention for it, so whatevs. Attention was attention to me, no matter how it came. Natural hair or healthy hair was far from my mind, as long as I was satisfied with how my hair looked.
Fast-forward 4 years, 2 major hair cuts, 3 color changes, and many many relaxers. You’ll find me (two months ago) with dry and brittle hair, frayed ends galore, and in hate with my hair.
Yeah, you read that right.
It’s a strong word, but let me tell you: when you are used to having semi-long healthy “pretty” hair, it’s difficult not to look back and mourn what was. Mmmhmm. Dramatic but true. When you feel like you only got a few things going for ya, and one of the main ones goes up in smoke, believe me, you get a little dramatic. A couple of months ago, after throwing the idea around my head for a while, I decided to go natural. Finally, I came to the realization that having long hair isn’t worth it if it isn’t healthy, shiny, and soft. My hair is none of that right now. And, oh, how I long for that.
So yes, I hate my hair right now. And I will continue to hate it for as long as I decide to keep these unhealthy ends. Going natural means having hair that isn’t chemically processed and at the present my hair is 90% permed. Therefore, as someone who is vain enough to feel like my hair makes me me, I am sure you can imagine how I feel about having to cut off…well, ME. I am dreading it, but I am definitely enjoying the journey.
Why do I say that? Well, although my ends are beyond hopeless in my eyes, my roots (my natural hair) is coming in and I am in love with it. The curls are just beautiful in my eyes. They are tight and dark and bouncy and beautiful. It feels nice to embrace what God gave me and see how my hair looks without it being chemically “fixed”. Who knew?
Join me in my journey. A new section of this blog will be devoted to my hair journey under BEAUTY, mainly because this journey makes me joyful and inspires me. Most importantly, I would love for more people to fall in love with what they got, like I am. Length is nothing if it doesn’t have strength backing it up. So this is the start of a new way of life for me.
I’M GOING NATURAL Y’ALL!!!
For documentation purposes, the photos that follow are of my hair a couple of months ago when I decided it was time to make a change.
The goal of the Hair Journey posts that follow is to keep me motivated, inspired and to possibly be a shoulder for any others who are deciding to transition with me. Let me know your victories and your struggles, I’m here and ready to offer support and encouragement!