…on it’s own timetable.

If you were to ask me, the number one key to unhappiness is desiring something you don’t have or dreaming of things that haven’t occurred. Whether it’s something reasonable or not isn’t the point.

I understand that this is a touchy subject for some and speaking about it will make me seem as if I feel like I am some love expert. But I personally feel like I know quite a bit about this subject. So I’d like to briefly share with you what I’ve learned:

1. You cannot control who walks in and out of your life. You can only control your own footsteps. The person for you could walk into your life tomorrow… Or two years from now. What if that person has been in your life for a good bit of time already? You never know. Yes, you don’t know. So what’s the point of constantly being on the lookout for love when you won’t even be able to recognise it until it finds you?

2. When you focus so much on finding love (who that Special Someone will be, when you’ll find them, how old you are, what Aunt Sally said to you at the last family wedding…) you start to lose your focus on what is really important, your happiness. Be happy. Catch up on your favorite shows on Netflix, visit Costa Rica, take up a new hobby!

3. If you are unhappy as a single person, you will be unhappy in a relationship as well. A person cannot change your emotional state permanently. If you need someone in order to be happy, what will you need next when you figure out that happiness still hasn’t occurred?

4. Casting so much attention on “The Perfect Person” distracts you from working on being “The Perfect Person”.  There’s nothing wrong with having a list (mental or physical) of what you want in a person, but it’s important to know you have to be a certain type of person to attract the person you are looking for. Use your time to better yourself into a woman or man someone can’t live without.

5. Do you. No need to stand in front of the stove waiting for the water to boil. Or to plant yourself outside with your head tilted up to the skies in expectation of rain. A minute can feel like an hour when you are staring at the clock. Live your life. Hang with your girls, explore the world, explore yourself! Eventually the water will boil, the clouds will spill over, and the minute will be over.

Don’t worry, Be happy.

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